Here’s the first one 
I call her “Petunia.” She doesn’t have “meaning” of sorts, more than making me smile when i see her. Petunia actually is a more lavender color, but the artist had to do a “wash” in order to get the pseudo color she’s supposed to be. So right now she’s very pink ‘cuz she’s healing. Once she’s healed she’ll be closer to the right color.
The second one is “snail.” They were both drawn by Matthew Gray Gubler. Snail..well, for me he shows how i’ve been making this slow but steady transition into the new me. The real me. Kind of why I also kept the “so slow” under the snail. Just..fits me lol
I love them both and will be printing photos of them to send to Matthew. I hope he likes them 
I know I do!!! :D:D:D
so, not much really to update on. am getting the net this coming monday *dances happily* finally!! no more chillin’ at mickey-dee’s for net LOL
Have an appointment for some more ink this friday. i’m so happy my skin is all tingly with anticipation. am getting 2 actually. will post photo’s prolly saturday so it’s not all bloody and shit LOL (i’m a bleeder 
)
have been doing tons of cleaning out and shit at home. am also finally getting into a good at home routine for chores, etc. have a lot more cleaning out to do. have also made the decision to get some bubble wrap friday and i’m putting my glass dishes in storage. (my basement lol) have gotten some new dinner ware that i love, and it’s plastic so when i drop it it won’t break LOL if you ask nice i’ll put up pics. trust me; you’ll get a rise out of it
Regarding me and this journey i’m on i’m finally coming full circle. A lot of where i’m going is places where i have been, in terms of personality, interests and stuff. It’s just spiced up a bit by the new me; the D/s, bdsm, etc. And i’m loving it!! It’s so…comforting, nice, etc to be coming back a bit to who i was before. It’s like..a coming home of sorts.
Well, i think that’s about it for now. I am making this trip to Mickey Dee’s quick ‘cuz i just really don’t want to sit here. Need to get home, wash some dishes, vacuum and then write.
I’ve started a new story i’m LOVING and i wanna start getting it typed up so i can save it. It’s gonna be a short story, but that’s alright. The working title is “The Orgiastic Massacre of Little Dogwood.” heh..heh..heh
So, decided to type this up at home, then post it tomorrow night when I’m babysitting the niece and nephew. So this was actually written 11-1-09. And you know what? I just realized I can connect to an open wifi in my neighborhood…so let’s see if, when I can actually finish typing this up, if the connection is strong enough to pull up wordpress so I can post it. Ugh…the net is really sucky. So. I think it’s gonna be posted tomorrow.
Dear god it’s November… I can’t believe it’s already November. I guess I’m sorta glad it is, ‘cuz that means more is in the past. More time has gone by, which means I’ve gotten farther along in this game called life.
I’m watching Criminal Minds. Love this show! I’m so fucking hooked on it. I’m considering getting cable just so I can get season 5 as it comes out lol.
I’ve realized over the last 3 years that there are 3 stages in a major life change. For me, I came out of my divorce and started realizing that who I was wasn’t who I was…if that makes sense. I was learning that I had so many needs that weren’t being met, and that I also had interests and wants that weren’t being fulfilled. While the wants are not as important, simply learning this was a total “holy fucking shit” moment.
For me, right around the time when my ex and I decided to start seeing other people, I joined an MMORPG to meet new people. Get out of my box, ya know. During that time, I did in fact meet someone, who ended up being my first Owner. Through him and the game I learned about my submissive nature.
I learned why I have the needs I do. Why I need to listen and be good. Why I need a man who is able to make the decisions.
Really, in the end that was kind of an exciting discovery for me. It was nice to finally figure out the why’s. I’m a bit of a why freak. I have a need-to-know complex. So having that knowledge has helped me. A lot. And I have learned a lot more about me and my needs since then.
As well as my interests. The biggest … “issue” I’ve been having lately has been trying to like… “BE” me. Ya know? Have who I am expressed in how I speak, how I dress how I look, how I live, my interior decorating. Things of that nature.
I’m starting to get that though! Starting to figure out exactly how to express myself, my personality. I’m cleaning out a lot of my old stuff. Things that no longer pertain to who I am, where I’m going in life. I’m finally getting into a routine at home as well, cleaning, housekeeping and such. I’ve gotten rid of about 3 bags of garbage, 3 boxes of books and 1 box of just misc stuff. And that was just this weekend. Got rid of 3 other boxes of stuff a couple weeks ago as well.
I still have several more storage boxes to go through. 4 of them, plus a box of books and a box of a few random things plus my stuffed animals. I’m debating about my plates, bowls, etc. I have some new stuff, Halloween stuff that I really like. I love fun monsters and stuff and actually got new plates and bowls that match some pillow cases I have now LOL but I really prefer those to my other ones, as nice as they really are. I’m considering getting some bubble wrap and storing them downstairs. I’ll be damned if I get rid of them.
((so apparently i didn’t finish writing this LOL will write more later))
Well, last night I had the best time evar!!! Went to a rockin’ halloween/sahmain party and had tons of fun! Dressed up as a naughty schoolgirl We had yummy food, and a couple drinks (well, i had only like, half of one lol) and we danced and sang and chanted and just shot the shit. It was a blast. I am so hung over from all the energy *laughs* but it’s a good hung over 
This is my favorite holiday and I’m finally learning to accept that it’s okay for me to have pumpkins and monsters out all year around LOL In a few minutes I’m gonna head over to target and walmart and see what they have on sale from their halloween stuff. Maybe there’ll be something good
Still working on getting the internet at home. I think I found who I’m gonna go with, but I’m debating on if I wanna get cable too. Part of me wants to, so I’ll have tv and can watch the news and Criminal Minds new season and all that, but I’ve been without cable for *so long* that I really don’t miss it, ya know? So, we’ll see.
Well, that’s about it for now. Nothing exciting really, so here’s a couple pics of me from last night.
So, over the last week (today would be the start of week 2) i had influenza. Goddam i was miserable!! Ugh… -.-
But anyway, it really gave me some time to think. Well, a lot of down time to think. And boy did I lol. So, I’m making some changes. I realized 2 main things during this … forced time of reflection
- 1 – I still use food as a comfort item. >.<
- 2 – I still try to conform to some arbitrary status quo of what I “should be”.
So anyway, I’m making some changes to be more true to my whole self, rather than bits and pieces of myself. I tend to focus overly much on one or two things for a while, and then focus on something else, and then focus on something else. Rinse and repeat. This is regularly to the detriment of other things. Perhaps I focus so much on a project I will forget to pay a bill, or I will let an interest wane so that it doesn’t get the attention I want it to have.
So, one thing I’ve done (well it’s technically 5) is to take down my profiles, etc on fetish sites and also i removed my fetish sites as well. Why have I done this? Well, first off I’m more into photographs. Secondly, (when I had the net and was able to devote time to it) I just wasn’t pulling the money in I needed. I was doing it only for the money and the one pay out I got helped me tons. Now I don’t even have the net right now so I’m not even able to do it anyway. Thirdly, my heart just wasn’t into it. There was always that little voice in the back of my head going “Hey, this isn’t me..why am I doing this?” And I kept telling myself excuses, ‘cuz it’s fun, for the money, etc. Well, it was dragging me down and it just wasn’t… me ya know?
I’ve been focusing too much on the external, on wanting to be as appealing as possible to as many as possible, etc etc and all the jazz that goes with it.
In the end, I need to become the best me that I can be. So. I’m cutting out a lot of needless stuff and going back to the beginning. I’m going to work on some projects to completion and throw out those that I don’t need/want/etc. And I’m going to start being me, start actually “being” me if you know what I mean. Going to work on stopping focusing on this one thing or that one thing and figure out how to actively be all of me all of the time.
Hope that makes sense LOL And for the record; i’m still submissive, still into petplay and bdsm and all that. I’m still ME
Yay for pink-ness! If you know me at all, or have read my blog at all y’all know i love pink. Pink pink pink…so when i saw The Fresh Chain Leash at Eden Fantasys well..i just had to have it!!! I mean…can you blame me??? 
This beauty has a nice pink chain, with a handle pink on the outside, and blue on the inside. The colors are very complimentary and I must say work very well together, so there’s not an overwheming-ness of pink. Yes, even I can get too much pink!! LOL
The leash is about 36″ long with a handle maybe 5-6″ long. In the long run, it’s more of a for looks leash however. Upon decent yanking and pulling it did break from the lobster clip, *however* it did fix quite easily!! So, for those of us in D/s petplay, this is more of a show leash, rather than an “i’m in a pushing mood and gonna push Master’s patience today.” It’s not for that LOL
It attaches quite nicely to a collar, with a standard easy to use lobster clip. It’s quite light, so does not pull uncomfortably on the collar.
The clip swivels, which allows for ease of movement, but also keep in mind the length of the leash. At only 3′ it’s for close quarters play, not long-distance walking. It’s perfect for keeping your pet at your side, or a nice walk through the park
The leash is quite pretty, and thus would look very nice attached to almost any collar.
The handle is a polyethylene plastic type material, and thus is very easy to clean with a cloth or baby wipe.
All in all, despite it being more of a parade-use rather than hard-core use item, i am quite pleased with it and am thinking of getting more in the Fresh lineup, which also has cuffs, ball-gag and other similar bondage and fetish items. I really like that they all match. Being a girly kittenpup, that type of stuff strokes my fur the right way lol
So… as always…thanks Eden Fantasys!!!!!
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Just wanted to let y’all know about my sexy friend, the Delicious Kitten!! She does live video chat every day (mon-fri) on the same site i do: imlive , and also does video clips at clips4sale (again like i do! LOL) http://www.clips4sale.com/store/19723
Who can’t love such a biteable, spankeable ass huh???
And you can keep track of her here: http://deliciouskitten.thumblogger.com/
You’ll certainly love her as much as i do!! MMaayyybbeee someday there’ll be a vid and photos of us together hmm??? *getting lots of ideas* muahahaha!!!
So while i’m on a wifi thought i’d throw out a quitck updatey. The move has gone well. it’s taking longer than i want to unpack and all ‘cuz the ex-temp-roomie, her new apartment, they had to re-drywall a wall i guess, on the last minute so she asked if i minded if she hung around a few extra days, which i didn’t mind. It was kinda nice actually, ‘cuz it allowed me to sort of re-integrate to not living with a family. Now she’s staying at her new place and most of her stuff is gone, so i’ve gotten a lot of unpacking done. Unfortunately, i also agreed to watch her cat until Tuesday night. It is the most annoying fuzzy thing i’ve ever come into contact with *eye roll* ahh well. She’s a good friend whose helped me out, so it’s no matter. Will be quite nice when the cat (Edgar) is gone though LOL
Anyway, that’s about all for now. I should have my own net again here in a couple weeks (hopefully). In the meanwhile, I’m trying to unpack, make my house a home, and tryign to figure out how to buy it… i really really want to buy it. But, I have bad credit so…*shrugs* we’ll see.
So i’m moving. Finally. Just to another place here in town but it’s my own place!! woot!
The old Master (T, the most recent) got back in touch with me to apologize. I have chosen to forgive him and we are talking again. Didn’t realize how much i missed him until now. I am glad he’s back in my life, but i have not submitted to him, nor has he asked. as it turns out the shit DID hit the fan for him at home. Though 3o seconds to tell me would have helped. But. I have put it in the past. And am moving forward.
I have found my spirituality again and am beginning to “practice’ again. Thank Goddess for that!
kk, not typing any more. Tomorrow is the big move day. Need energy..
**WARNING: MAY HAVE SPOILERS!!**
Pirates is an adult film by Adam & Eve and Digital Playground. I honestly can’t say how excited I was when Eden Fantasys sent it to me to review. Aside from simply needing a new adult film, I had watched the edited version from Blockbuster and quite enjoyed it. Was one of those “gotta see it gotta see it” things for me LOL. What?? Pirates are fucking sexy!! Not to mention pirates are sexy when they’re fucking as well!!
In Pirates we follow a pirate hunter Capt. Edward Reynolds (Evan Stone) as he tries to capture the villainous pirate Victor Stagnetti (Tommy Gunn) … both MUY YUMMY!!! Throughout the movie we get to watch as they bumble (there are some great comedy relief moments) and have sex (10 incredible scenes) throughout the sea and some yummy den of pirate-ish iniquities.
Seeing as this IS indeed a XXX film, it starts out with a great sex scene between Isabella (Carmen Luvana) and her husband Manuel Valenzuela (Kris Slater). What I really like about this movie is that because of the actual plot in it (and yes, there really is a plot!!) the actors (and yes, I firmly believe that porn starts *are* actors (some more than others…) there is emotion to the sex. Gives it that extra oomph that traditional porns don’t have. 
Now of course, the acting is not quite what it would be in a traditional Hollywood film, but it’s still well worth watching in my opinion!! One must also keep in mind that they do not have the budget of Hollywood films, thus the special affects are also not quite what one would expect. (Think about a half to full step below the SciFi [SyFy >.<] Channel).
I was quite happy to see that Capt. Reynolds first mate was Jules played by the incredible Jessie Jane. I have found my favorite two porn stars in the first mates. Jessie Jane and also Stagnetti’s first mate Serena played by the most delish Janine
I have to say that I enjoyed the costumes. They’re actually quite well done, and work very well for each character as well as the time period and subject matter. Pirates people pirates! lol I have to say that I LOVE how Evan Stone played Reynolds. The mannerisms and speech pattern work so well for the character. As well as how Steven St. Croix playing Marco. Both actors really found their character and let him shine through the screen.
Also the sound track is quite enjoyable. It’s not the standard bow-chicca-bow-bow you get in traditional porno’s. It fits nicely with the pirate theme and works for each scene. Also, it was composed specifically for this movie.
For the sex scenes I think they did very well. We get a little bit of everything with F/F, M/F and F/F/M. About the only thing we’re missing is M/M. *pouts* Maybe they did one in Pirates 2… (makes mental note to get it). For the record, the very last sex scene is my favorite F/F and my fav M/F scene is the “fire scene”. Teehee not telling more on that one! Also, they worked the sex into the plot quite nicely. It’s nice to have a movie with some good sex in it, that’s more than just a bunch of wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am’s in a row.
Anyway, the movie is a good 2 hours long and during the whole 2 hours we have plot development as well as character development. It’s entertaining to watch how Jules truly supports Reynolds (they are childhood friends) as they track down Stagnetti. Starting at sea and finding a floating woman they go to Sword Scabbard Island to find information about where Stagnetti is.
We spend a good time on Sword Scabbard Island enjoying the …bountiful joys of Evan Stone and a couple wonderful ladies.
As well as a glimpse into the intricate relationship between Jules and Marco (Steven St. Croix). First off holy SHIT can Jessie Jane give head!! Secondly, Steven St. Croix is a pretty damn good actor!!
Here’s a good example of not only the F/F and the character development. (Not giving away more than that Yeh gotta watch it yourself teehee) Isabella and the “pirate dancer” (Jenaveve Jolie)
And just ‘cuz Evan Stone is fucking edible and this scene is quite hot…(I could watch this scene over and over..and the music is just perfect for it as well)
So after we leave Sword Scabbard Island we chase Stagnetti down and find him in a cave. Here we get swords, comic relief and evil skeletons We also get more character development here, which I think is great. Now, in the interest of leaving some to the imagination, I shall share no more pics of the rest of the sex scenes! That means you have to go watch it yourself!! And, ‘cuz i totally rock the kazbah here’s a likee to purchase it click me . *points to the left* if you look over there you can find my discount code (6CF) and get a %% off! (( And I have to say. Each and every one of you *MUST* see the scene between Serena (Janine) and Stagnetti (Tommy Gunn…) … hot dayam!!))
…Alright. Just ‘cuz i love you guys here’s some Janine and Tommy Gunn (Serena and Stagnetti)
So you have pirates having sex, M/F, F/F and M/F/F. You have character development and THIS where they say such things as “Come on you filthy little whore cum on me!” and “Spit on me bitch!” (**NOT** exact quotes). Do you REALLY wanna go without seeing it? Yea. I thought not. (Well I certainly didn’t do well on that whole “not giving more scene shots” thing now did I? LOL)
Now I just wanna say that there’s at least ONE sex scene where I have not provided a screen shot, and it’s my favorite F/F scene in the whole movie. Muahaha!!!
Incredible sex. Good dialogue. Good costumes. Great music. Good character development. Great characters period! Watch it people watch it!!!
 DVD by Digital Playground
Cast: Tommy Gunn, Austyn Moore, Jenaveve Jolie, Teagan Presley
Director: Joone |
